Where am I in all this? I think it’s fair to say I’m a little bit lost. Directionless. Hopefully like the calm before the storm. My course starts tomorrow, and I guess this time was always reserved for readjustment. I am lonely, too. Like the realisation has just dawned on me that I’m all alone over here, that while I travel deep friendships will be hard to come by. That’s struck me fairly hard. I’m on my own and have nobody really to turn to. Only now am I beginning to understand the value of the contacts people have been giving me – a chance to touch base with some level of intimacy, however fleeting. A little like my first months in Melbourne, only this time there is no family, nothing to turn to when each step becomes a struggle, when the light turns dim and even my shadow leaves me.
But if this is what it takes to understand the value of companionship, of friendship, then let it be, let me learn.
And looking around me, I can see I’m not the only one being taught this lesson. Travellers are a lonely bunch, by and large, and touching base, connecting with them is a task made all the harder by their idiosyncrasies and inabilities in communication. I am but one of them.