Keep it simple, silly

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Robyn's birthday

Robyn’s birthday. Happy birthday, Robyn. As I sit surrounded by this green land I find another moment to think of you and us and how things came to pass.

I love you Robyn, and I am so glad we split. We have each come closer to what we were seeking than we would have together. Our relationship was, in many respects, compromise. I could never be who you wanted me to be, and vice versa. I think now we are each closer to who we want ourselves to be, and that is a gift.

You have always wanted to know why I left, and maybe this is it. For so much of our relationship I was looking for that reason and could never find it, but the mere fact that I was looking for it was probably reason enough. I felt compromised; will that do?

That night I came home and told you I was moving onto a community was the moment I could no longer accept being compromised anymore. I had no other way to express it then. Today, hopefully, I would do a better job.

And I am not saying, Robyn – not for one second – that you compromised me. I compromised myself by not being clear: to you or me.

I am trying to be more honest now, Robyn. I am trying to be more open. I am trying very hard to prevent such a compromising situation ever happening again. And I can report that – for the moment – I am doing a much better job than I did with you.

I am sorry that our breakup was so hurtful to you, and I am thankful that it led to something much better for you. And I love you very much and am forever grateful for all you continue to teach me.

Thank you so much. You are beautiful.


Blogger Jade said...

Such a beautiful thing to do Jamie...I've sent so many actions and thoughts like this out to past partners, it's rarely been met until alot later, but it's so incredible when it eventually is...beautiful way to come back to a painfull place and feel peace and love again...I salute you...

1:15 pm, May 16, 2006


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