Robyn's birthday

Robyn’s birthday. Happy birthday, Robyn. As I sit surrounded by this green land I find another moment to think of you and us and how things came to pass.

I love you Robyn, and I am so glad we split. We have each come closer to what we were seeking than we would have together. Our relationship was, in many respects, compromise. I could never be who you wanted me to be, and vice versa. I think now we are each closer to who we want ourselves to be, and that is a gift.

You have always wanted to know why I left, and maybe this is it. For so much of our relationship I was looking for that reason and could never find it, but the mere fact that I was looking for it was probably reason enough. I felt compromised; will that do?

That night I came home and told you I was moving onto a community was the moment I could no longer accept being compromised anymore. I had no other way to express it then. Today, hopefully, I would do a better job.

And I am not saying, Robyn – not for one second – that you compromised me. I compromised myself by not being clear: to you or me.

I am trying to be more honest now, Robyn. I am trying to be more open. I am trying very hard to prevent such a compromising situation ever happening again. And I can report that – for the moment – I am doing a much better job than I did with you.

I am sorry that our breakup was so hurtful to you, and I am thankful that it led to something much better for you. And I love you very much and am forever grateful for all you continue to teach me.

Thank you so much. You are beautiful.