+ / -
Suze asked: Is it that much easier to be negative and furtive, than open, positive and grateful?
I don’t know.
For me, being positive and open about myself was once virtually impossible. Maybe it was only as I came to understand that I am forgiven that I began to be able to forgive myself. And through forgiveness comes love, for forgiveness is love’s mechanism. And where there is love – true love – there can be nothing else, no exceptions. I am included in the everything that excludes nothing else.
It is impossible not to love myself when I love everything.
From memory, when I first did the exercise I did in Self disclosure I found myself finally being able to break through the barrier to admitting positive things about myself. It was at the School for The Work with Byron Katie, in an exercise on accepting the gift of criticism. Each day of that School was designed to help open me up to love, and that exercise was a big part of it. Another big part of it had elements of the earlier piece that Self disclosure was a result of: if only you could witness the things I have seen people admit to. If only you could experience the love flooding that room as they did.
I guess the key to forgiveness is realizing that I am all of this. When I can find myself in the meanest despot and the kindest angel, and when I can forgive that, my work is done. Like love, forgiveness is total.
When I am in a forgiving space – let’s call it grace – it is so much easier to be open, positive and grateful, than negative and furtive. In fact, the latter two are impossible.